Read An Excerpt From ‘Wretched Waterpark’ by Kiersten White

From New York Times bestselling author Kiersten White comes her middle grade series debut! Part Scooby Doo, part A Series of Unfortunate Events, and entirely genius! Meet the Sinister-Winterbottom twins, who solve mysteries at increasingly bizarre summer vacation destinations in the hopes of being reunited with their parents—or at the very least finally finding a good churro.

Intrigued? Well read on to discover the synopsis and an excerpt from Kiersten White’s Wretched Waterpark, which is out June 7th 2022!

Twelve-year-old twins Theodora and Alexander and their older sister Wilhelmina Sinister-Winterbottom don’t know how they ended up with their Aunt Saffronia for an entire summer. She’s not exactly well equipped to handle children. The twins are determined to make it a good vacation, though, so when Aunt Saffronia suggests a waterpark, they hastily agree.

But Fathoms of Fun is not your typical waterpark. Instead of cabanas, guests rent mausoleums. The waterslides are gray tongues extending from horrible gargoyle faces. The few people they encounter are very, very odd. And the owner disappeared under bizarre circumstances, lost to the Cold, Unknowable Sea—the wave pool.

When Wil goes missing, rule following, cautious Alexander and competitive, brave Theo will have to work together to solve the mystery of Fathoms of Fun. But are they out of their depth?


Fog drifted around their feet, clinging greedily, like it wanted to pull them into a watery grave.

And maybe, this being the worst summer ever, it would actually end that way.

“To save Wil,” Theo whispered.

“To save our friends,” Alexander whispered.

“To save—well, let’s just do those two first and worry about the rest if we survive.” Theo was always practical that way. Her brother nodded. They clutched each other’s hands and took a deep breath. Then they jumped into the pool, glowing green and hungry beneath them. Their dark hair floated behind them as they sank, slowly, to the bottom, took a few steps . . .

And then disappeared.

Chapter One

Their aunt was decidedly Sinister.

But only because she was from their mother’s side of the family. If she had been from their father’s side of the family, she would have been decidedly Winterbottom. It had been a great trial for each of the Sinister-Winterbottom children to learn how to write their own names, something their usually thoughtful parents had neglected to think through.

Another thing their parents had neglected to think through was the wisdom of dropping off sixteen-year-old Wilhelmina Sinister-Winterbottom (who had actually learned how to write her own name as a toddler), twelve-year-old Theodora Sinister-Winterbottom (who had never to this day written out her whole name, preferring Theo), and also twelve-year-old Alexander Sinister-Winterbottom (who had always insisted on each and every letter of his entire name and would not answer to Alex even if he were hanging off the side of the cliff and the search party was frantically shouting it) to spend the summer with their aunt Saffronia Sinister, whom the children had never met, and who, by all appearances, had never encountered an actual human child before.

Wil had been adopted as a baby. Theo and Alexander had joined the family four years later, born hand in hand. Sometimes, still, when they weren’t paying attention or they were nervous or scared, they reached for each other’s hands.

They weren’t reaching for each other’s hands now, though, because they weren’t nervous or scared. Just confused. Their noses—with matching freckles dotted across quick-to-sunburn white skin—wrinkled in unison.

“Do you remember getting here?” Alexander whispered.

“What?” Theo answered, shifting closer to him. Her short, spiky brown hair was pushed back from her forehead with a headband. Alexander’s was neatly combed and gelled into place.

“How did we get here?”

“The kitchen?”

“No, this house, in— Where are we? What town is this, Aunt Saffronia?”

But Aunt Saffronia spoke as though she didn’t hear Alexander’s question. “I wonder about your parents’ judgment, summoning me. I am not well suited to—” Aunt Saffronia gestured vaguely in their direction. “And I wonder if you will be suited to the grave tasks ahead. Still. They had no other options.”

“So you’re taking care of us. The whole summer.” Theo scowled.

Aunt Saffronia merely nodded. “How often would you say you need to eat? If I set out some food in the morning, will that be enough?”

Australia

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