Conversations With Unexpected Book Nerds: Andrea Barber

Hi Andrea and thank you so much for taking the time to answer a few questions for The Nerd Daily! You are well known and loved for playing the role of Kimmy Gibbler on ​Full House ​ and, more recently, on the Netflix reboot ​Fuller House; however, in November of last year you published a memoir titled ​Full Circle, which shows the world many more sides of you and your life. If you had to use ten words or less to help fans see the whole, “real” you — not just the actress or character they have seen on TV — how would you describe yourself?

Bites fingernails. Hates small chat. Loves texting. Lives in hoodies.

When did you first get the itch to write a memoir and what sparked this idea for you? Why was it important for the book to be about not just the public side of you, but also to really explore your personal experiences?

For my entire life I’ve thought, “I want to write a book someday.” It was a friend who nudged me and suggested, “You have a large audience willing to listen ​now. Don’t wait!” So I set out to write my memoir a little over two years ago. There was so much of my private self that I wanted to share with people, but never had the opportunity. TV interviews are only two and half minutes long, red carpet interviews are 30 seconds if you’re lucky. How do I convey all of me in a 30 second soundbite? Writing ​Full Circle ​ was my chance to show a side of myself that no one (outside of family and friends) had ever seen. I spent the 20 years between ​Full ​and ​Fuller House​ completely out of the spotlight. I had gone through some pretty dark times (depression, divorce), but I also accomplished a lot (Bachelor’s and Master’s degrees). ​Full Circle ​ covers all of it!

In ​Full Circle ​you say: “I am here to talk about my anxiety and depression. Because, dammit, it’s critical that we talk about it. It’s important to let each other know that we’re not alone. It’s important to let others know what it’s like living with anxiety and depression every day.” You have done a brilliant job of this with the book! Have you been involved with mental health advocacy in other ways or have you considered venturing more in that direction in the future?

Thank you! I’m currently an ambassador for NAMI (National Alliance for Mental Illness) and was a captain for one of their fundraiser walks. I would love to be more involved moving forward. But honestly, I believe you don’t need a title or to be a celebrity in order to be an ambassador for mental health. One of the biggest impacts we can make is by sharing our personal stories however we feel most comfortable: Facebook. Face-to-face with a friend. Texting. Blogging. When we share our stories, everyone’s defenses are lowered and it just becomes a very relatable, human experience.

In your book, you also share many stories about your time spent on the sets of ​Full House and ​Fuller House, as well as your close relationships with the cast. I’m curious, what are some  of your favorite episodes of the shows?

My favorite episode of ​Full House​ is “Birthday Blues,” the one where DJ forgets Kimmy’s 16th birthday. I loved this episode because it shows two great sides to Kimmy: her loveable side and her sensitive side. In the episode, the Tanners throw together a last-minute party with toilet paper streamers and a hashbrown cake, yet Kimmy is so touched by their gesture. It doesn’t matter to her that it’s cheap toilet paper decorations; it’s the intention behind it and the fact that it’s an event that honors her. She feels loved by people she cares about. I love this about Kimmy. Then, when she discovers the party is a cover-up for DJ forgetting Kimmy’s birthday, Kimmy shows genuine hurt – and expresses it openly to DJ. This is the first time in the series that we see this sensitive side of Kimmy Gibbler. I loved performing this scene. It was a great chance to do something other than sarcastic one-liners!

My favorite episodes from ​Fuller House​ include “Nutcrackers” (because getting to perform the Rat King death scene was insanely fun and creative) and the New Kids on the Block episode (for obvious reasons, notably my 30-year love and devotion for the band).

You mention a few times throughout ​Full Circle​ that you are a lifelong fan of New Kids on the Block. As a fellow “Blockhead” (translation: huge NKOTB fan), I absolutely cannot go through this interview without asking you about your love for the boys in the band! You are fortunate enough to have become friends with the guys over the years. Could you share your favorite memory with them?

I’m lucky to have so many great memories with the New Kids on the Block. One of my favorites is one I talk about in my book – dancing in the rain at the Mixtape Festival in Hershey, Pennsylvania, completely letting loose and shedding all of the stress of my divorce. It was a moment of pure joy and escape that I needed so desperately at that time.

I also love every single NKOTB cruise I’ve gone on. My favorite cruise moments are simply standing on the Lido deck, watching the guys do their thing and take thousands of selfies, making so many fans’ dreams come true. It’s truly a special thing to witness. The guys work SO hard on the cruise to make it a special experience for the fans. They know that those four days are likely the only “me” time the fans have away from the stress of work and family demands. And they bust their buns to make it an awesome experience.

One last memory (I could go on and on about this topic forever!!): Going with Jonathan Knight to watch Joe McIntyre perform in ​Waitress ​ on Broadway. How cool is that?? Everyone knows Joe is an exceptional singer but not everyone knows how talented he is as an actor, too. I love seeing him perform in non-NKOTB related ways. And Jon is such a down-to-earth, funny and supportive friend. It was just an amazing night in so many ways!

It’s surreal that I’ve become friends with some of the guys. I still get that flutter of excitement in my stomach whenever I see them. The magic never goes away!

Writing, in theory, sounds like a great, inspiring, fun thing to do … but it is also a lot of hard work, as you well know! What are some of your favorite and least favorite things about writing that you discovered through the process of writing ​Full Circle?

Oh man. I realized that I NEED to schedule time for writing. It’s not something I could just “fit in” around the rest of my day. So I actually blocked off several hours on my calendar each day and (most importantly) PUT AWAY MY PHONE. No distractions! This was critical.

I loved the creative catharsis of writing. It fills me with so much satisfaction. There is nothing more fulfilling than pouring words out through your fingers that feel exactly right. I loved every moment of it -even the writers’ block. I learned that productivity isn’t necessarily defined by the number of pages you produce each day; writing isn’t systematic like that. I would write for three hours each day, and whether I produced 2 pages or 20 pages, I considered it a success if I just sat down and wrote. Most days were filled with “word vomits” – or stream-of-conscious type writing. But writing begets writing – the more I forced myself to write, the easier the words flowed out my fingertips.

In your book you mention that you have always enjoyed writing, even before the memoir came about. I have also heard that you wrote an episode for the second half of the final season of ​Fuller House! Could you talk a bit more about your experiences with writing aside from your memoir?

Writing an episode for ​Fuller House ​ was one of the coolest experiences. It was just so different than anything I’d done (ironically, because I’ve had over a decade of experience performing on a sitcom). But the actors usually don’t see a script until a week before we tape it. Starting from the very genesis of an idea and breaking it out and building an entire episode over three months was so awesome and challenging. I was fully invested in my episode unlike any other. I knew it inside and out. Working with a team of writers was also very cool and challenging. The synergy of the writers’ room was an ethereal experience. It moves fast and writers are pitching jokes and ideas a mile a minute. It was hard to keep up at first but once I got the hang of it, it was magic. So many brilliant minds working at the same time. It was exhilarating. It was also challenging because I had to let go of some things I’d written that I was attached to. There were a lot of cuts – there are always so many cuts and revisions once the studio and network give their notes! – so I learned that you just have to check your emotional investment in the script at the door and let the process flow. It always ends up better in the end!

Let’s shift for a bit from your writing life to your reading life. I am always interested in hearing about how people come to love reading. How did you become a reader? Was it as a young child or did you find the interest later in life?

I have always loved reading since I was a child. I feel like we have lost the art of reading with the growth of this short-attention-span culture that functions in 180 characters or less. And that makes me sad. Social media has created a very noisy space in which people don’t even take the time to read long captions on Instagram. Who has time to read a 300-page book?? And that makes me sad. Books make me a better person for having read them. I can’t say the same for Twitter. Books are a way of deeply engaging with a topic or becoming fully invested in a story. It’s unlike any other form of escape. I wish more people read books. A bookstore is better than Disneyland for me! I want to read everything and there is never enough time!

What is the first book you remember really loving?

Noisy Nora ​ by Rosemary Wells was one of the first books I remember reading over and over and over and over with my mom. I loved doing the voice of Nora. Maybe that book was a great blending of both my acting and reading skills. I was also a huge fan of ​The Babysitters Club series and ​Nancy Drew ​ series.

As an undergraduate in college, you studied English literature. What drew you to this as a major? You also mention in your memoir how you loved reading Thoreau and Walt Whitman. Could you share a bit more about other genres or authors that you enjoyed studying?

My love of reading and writing drew me to my English Lit major. I always suffered through the sciences, but the humanities! I felt at home with the humanities. Reading books and writing essays? Sign me up! I was especially drawn to transcendentalism and the importance of nature – how nature can free our minds to connect to our inner spirit. I still feel that today. Our world has become very busy and complicated, and if we could just throw it back to Thoreau, life could be much easier. Simple wants, simple needs. We see this in the minimalist movement. How much happier would we be if we cut out the clutter (mental clutter as well as physical clutter) from our lives and bring it back to the basics? This is what we need in this current Culture of Want.

What is your all-time favorite book? (Yes, you can name more than one!)

OH MAN. This is hard. I have never cried so hard as I did reading ​When Breath Becomes Air ​ by Paul Kalanthi. ​Digital Minimalism ​ by Cal Newport is a book that everyone needs to read, especially those who find themselves more and more attached to their phone and (not-so-coincidentally) more and more agitated. ​The Handmaid’s Tale ​ is a classic must-read (and I would have said this looong before the Hulu show came to being)! ​Educated ​ by Tara Westover will have you hooked and in disbelief before the end of the first chapter. The book that inspired me to run: ​Born to Run ​ by Christopher McDougall. And the book that every girl must read: ​The Diary of Anne Frank ​ rocked my world in junior high.

What about the worst book you’ve ever read?

I wasn’t a big fan of the ​Twilight ​ series. Sorry (not sorry)! It just wasn’t my thing!

What are you currently reading? And for that matter, how do you find time to read with your busy schedule?!?

Oh there is always time to read. PUT DOWN THE DAMN PHONE! Seriously. Just stop reading the news or Facebook for a couple of days and you’ll be amazed at how much time you suddenly have to read a book. I just finished ​Know My Name ​ by Chanel Miller, the survivor of the Stanford swimmer rape case. Stunning. She is so honest and brave and describes her experience with so much emotion and self-awareness. And I just started ​The Testaments ​ by Margaret Atwood. Long overdue and I’m not disappointed so far! She is fierce.

I firmly believe that words have the power to shape our lives in many ways. How have books, reading, and/or writing added meaning or value your life?

I am smarter and more well-rounded because I read books. I don’t mean to come off as conceited when I say that. But I believe books make us better people. We develop longer attention spans when we read books, which in turn helps us have longer, deeper conversations with other people. Books connect us. Books help us be able to talk about broader topics, and more in depth. I will obviously always have weekends that I spend on my couch binging the latest popular series or crime documentary on Netflix. That is a necessary part of decompressing! But I feel a deeper sense of satisfaction when I spend my free time reading books. It is deeply satisfying unlike any other free activity.

For one last question, let’s come “full circle” back around to ​Fuller House… The second half of the final season will be airing later this year, which I can only imagine must generate such a mixture of emotions for you, as well as tons of questions about what you will do “next” in your career. In a broader sense, though, we have just entered a new decade, which often encourages people to look at the direction of their life. With that in mind, I’m curious if there are certain passions or interests that you hope to have the space to explore in the years ahead?

Looking forward, I want to A.) be creative, or B.) advocate passionately. I love to act and write
and create and think. But I would love to merge the two and be creative with more of a purpose beyond just entertainment. Entertainment provides such a necessary escape for people and our world cannot live without that. But I would love to entertain in a way that also includes advocacy for causes for which I’m passionate. I would love to write books for middle schoolers about characters who feel different or feel like they don’t quite belong. Kimmy Gibbler has been quite a muse in this way. I would love to work with students and help them find their voice – whether that be developing the courage to perform on a stage or learn about themselves through the eyes of another culture. As I get older, I keep asking myself, “What story do you want to tell?” And that is the question I hold in the palm of my hand as I find my way forward in life. What story do I want to tell – creatively through writing or acting? Or practically by working with students? What’s important? What’s missing in this life? What do we need more of? I’m trying to answer that question and fill that void.