We chat with author Shelly Jay Shore about Rules for Ghosting, which is a poignant and tender debut, perfect for fans of the swoonworthy romance and queer community of One Last Stop and the macabre humor and family dysfunction of Mostly Dead Things.
Hi, Shelly! Can you tell our readers a bit about yourself?
I’m a social worker by education, and my day job is in nonprofit fundraising, writing, and strategy development. I’m a former theatre kid, an unrepentant coffee addict, a dog person, and a shameless advocate of watching the same comfort TV show 80 times instead of watching something new.
When did you first discover your love for writing and stories?
Birth? Or close to it! I’ve always loved stories, and started writing just about as soon as I could spell.
Quick lightning round! Tell us:
- The first book you ever remember reading: Dealing with Dragons by Patricia C. Wrede. But my mother would say Pickle Things by Marc Brown.
- The one that made you want to become an author: Spindle’s End by Robin McKinley
- The one that you can’t stop thinking about: The Pairing by Casey McQuiston
Your debut novel, Rules for Ghosting, is out August 20th! If you could only describe it in five words, what would they be?
Queer Ghosts [vs.] Eldest Daughter Syndrome
What can readers expect?
Ghosts, gays, and Jewish family drama. I pitched the book as Six Feet Under meets Casey McQuiston’s One Last Stop — it’s a genre mix of romance, family drama, and queer comedy, with a side of tenderness and a slow descent into the mortifying ordeal of being known.
Where did the inspiration for Rules for Ghosting come from?
My mother and I had a conversation shortly after my grandmother’s funeral about the drivers of the “family cars” — the funeral home employees or contractors who drive the cars that escort immediate families from funerals to gravesites, and then usually home again — and the kinds of conversations they must overhear. That turned into the idea to write a funeral home novel, and that funeral home novel — many iterations later! — became Rules for Ghosting.
Were there any moments or characters you really enjoyed writing or exploring?
I really enjoyed exploring the way Ezra’s relationships with the people in his life, particularly the ways in which his level of self-consciousness and the extent to which he self-analyzes and self-edits changes depending on who he’s with. He’s a very different person when he’s with his siblings compared to when he’s with his friends, with his parents, or with Jonathan. I also really loved exploring the different dynamics that Ezra had with his roommates, his friends, and with Jonathan and Ben — relationships are always my favorite things to write, and this book is definitely full of them.
This is your debut published novel! What was the road to becoming a published author like for you?
I always feel a little bit guilty about this story, because it was almost terrifyingly smooth! I’ve done NaNoWriMo for years and have written a pile of books that will never see the light of day, but Rules for Ghosting was the first novel I ever seriously revised and considered querying. I started the first draft in February 2021, revised that summer and early fall, and started querying in late November of that year. I signed with my agent in March of 2022, and we worked on the book together over that summer doing some structural and story edits before going out on submission on Halloween — capitalizing on those spooky vibes! We had a bunch of offers come in really quickly, and ended up selling almost exactly two weeks after going out on sub. It was wild.
What’s next for you?
I’m currently drafting my second book, which is shaping up to be similarly queer and weird and Jewish, about a musician and a golem who end up on a cross-country road trip. After that’s turned into my agent, I have a few other projects that need to be translated from vibes into moodboards and playlists — then we’ll see if any of them manage to turn into actual books.
Lastly, what books have you enjoyed so far this year and are there any that you can’t wait to get your hands on?
This has been such a good year for books! I read fairly wildly across genres, so this list might be a bit weird, but I absolutely adored The Sins on Their Bones by Laura R. Samotin, But How Are You Really? by Ella Dawson, and Housemates by Emma Copley Eisenberg. Casey McQuiston’s The Pairing has obviously lived rent-free in my head for months since I read it this winter.
I’m really looking forward to Bury Your Gays by Chuck Tingle (it came out in July, but I haven’t managed to snag a copy yet), as well as Mistress of Lies by K.M. Emright, Lucy Undying by Kiersten White, and The Resurrectionist by A. Rae Dunlap. Generally, if it’s queer and weird, it’s almost definitely on my (very, very long) TBR list.
