The real-life horror movie has begun. The blonde is up first, then the asshole—right up to the Final Girl. Unless the murderous cycle can be broken, they’re all going to be next.
The Blonde Dies First is magnificent in its murderous mayhem. It is pure slasher gold and should definitely be gracing your shelves.
Joelle Wellington burst onto the scene and straight into my heart with the phenomenal Their Vicious Games—a cutting satirical mystery with bite and darkness at its core. Wellington continues this winning streak here, proving that great characterisation and delectably dark tales are a hallmark of her work. The horror tones of Their Vicious Games take centre stage in this incredibly insidious original horror thriller, that also pays homage to classic slashers. It is just such a gorily good time.
I’m quickly learning that Wellington is deft at weaving in exploration of wider social topics into her writing—The Blonde Dies First delves into race and class particularly. The social commentary is nuanced and true to life, especially examining the clash of cultural expectations and the mindsets that accompany this. It is an intersection of class and race that just is not seen depicted in the media. Class is such a key presence in society and it is so intrinsically intertwined with ideas around race. In particular focus here is the way that your upbringing can lead you to have an entirely different live—Wellington explores the switching and adapting that is often forced upon marginalised people of colour. It also comes in comedically via the horror aspects, which I’ll expand on later in this review.
At its heart, we have two sisters: Devon and Drew. Their relationship forms the crux of the book as their lives seem to be splitting off, after being inseparable before. I liked how messy and authentic they were—they do not fit neatly into any preconceived ideas or boxes. Instead, they make mistakes, they fight and they are stubborn at times. Devon acts as our protagonist and you can keenly feel that hurt and sense of isolation as she feels like everything is coming apart for her. This is channelled into an obsessive control of wanting to make their final summer together perfect, with dire consequences. The supporting cast was also fantastic, with dialogue that crackled with humour and heart. They also all get moments to develop and reflect—feeling like they all grow in one way or another. I also have to shoutout the subtler relationship dynamic that develops over the course of the book. It is a really heart-warming contrast to the horror around them but never feels forced or like it’s overshadowing.
In particular, it pays respect to classics and newcomers of the slasher genre – showing an immersion in and appreciation for these types of stories. The author’s note at the back of the book also paid tribute to the iconic Wes Craven and I definitely felt that respect to his style comes through in terms of the humour and wit infused into the book. It is a very meta take on horror, with characters acknowledging unwritten rules of the genre. Even the title plays into that meta narrative blending and awareness of tropes. There’s also an acknowledgment of the long running understanding in horror narratives that BIPOC characters may immediately nope out at any sort of messing around with the supernatural. It stems from a cultural awareness that this is the kind of stupidity reserved for white privilege that also fails to learn from the mistakes of their predecessors and a lack of knowledge about the consequences of their actions. Wellington consistently tackles this throughout, from the hilarious initial scenes to the meta running commentary and internal monologues.
This book flips the script on typical slasher narratives, in part because of its focus on a group of BIPOC characters dealing with this mess created by stupid, privileged people. Wellington plays into these tropes and character archetypes to unpick them and instead present us with complex, compelling characters. It is also excellent to see a cast of BIPOC characters in this space which has been historically dominated by white voices and narratives, with marginalised characters as a punchline or early kill. Without giving everything away, let us just say that Wellington plays by different rules here.
It’s also such a great book in terms of terrifying atmosphere. The summoning scene is perfectly pitched in the way the party scene immediately sours when the supernatural comes into play. Instantly, there is a sense of foreboding and darkness that is acknowledged by our central characters but ignored by others. This is also the point where things start to get gnarly. There are some stomach-churning scenes in here. It is brutal and bloody. Wellington does not mess around when it comes to the slash in slasher. This has some brilliant and gruesome original kills—constantly ramping up the tension and increasing the stakes. Nothing feels certain or safe until the final page. As before, Wellington weaves a web that you cannot help but get entangled in. This is a layered plot with plenty to say about misogyny, gentrification and carving out your own path in life.
The Blonde Dies First cements Wellington as a tour de force. Whatever she decides to turn her pen towards next, you can bet it’ll be brilliant.
The Blonde Dies First is available from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and other good book retailers, like your local bookstore, as of July 30th 2024.
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Synopsis | Goodreads
A group of friends fight to choose their own fates in this trope-savvy, self-referential young adult thriller from the acclaimed author of Their Vicious Games, about a demonic force that acts according to horror movie rules in the spirit of the Scream movies.
Devon is always being left behind by her genius twin sister, Drew. At this point, it’s a fact of life. But Devon has one last plan before Drew leaves for college a whole year early—The Best Summer Ever. After committing to the bit a little too much, the twins and their chaotic circle of friends learn why you don’t ever mess with a Ouija board if you want to actually survive the Best Summer Ever, and soon find themselves being hunted down by…a demon?
But while there’s no mistaking the creeping, venomous figure is not from around here, their method doesn’t feel very demonic at all. In fact, it’s downright human—going after them in typical slasher movie kill order. And that means Devon, the blonde, is up first and her decade-long crush, Yaya, is the Final Girl who must kill or be killed to end the cycle.
Devon has never liked playing by anyone else’s rules though, not even a demon’s, and the longer this goes on, the more she feels Drew and Yaya slipping away from her even as she tries to help them all survive. Can they use their horror movie knowledge to flip the script and become the hunters instead of the hunted? Or will their best summer ever be their last?
