Psst! #ReadWithPride is a new series here on The Nerd Daily where we strive to regularly highlight #ownvoices authors and their queer stories! This series aims to shed more light on diverse, unique reads; we want to make sure that everyone can find themselves represented in books! If you have a suggestion for a book you would love to gain more attention, drop us a line! In the words of Raymond Holt from Brooklyn Nine-Nine: “Every time someone steps up and says who they are, the worlds becomes a better, more interesting place.” We appreciate your help in doing our part to create that place!
Why This Book Will Steal Your Heart:
- The friendship dynamics between Felix and Ezra will mend your heart (cinnamon roll who is protected by equally messy cinnamon roll, basically)
- There’s a whodunit plot that will keep you on your toes
- If you like the friends-to-lovers trope and the enemies-to-lovers trope…you should pick this up. IMMEDIATELY.
- Felix and Ezra attend an art class and the discussions on intention and meaning are incredible
- Felix’s internal thoughts on wanting love and wanting to be loved without wanting to compromise who he is are so important!
- The underlying message of this book is something we all need to hear: I see you. You belong wherever you feel loved. You are valid. You are enough. *cue me crying in the background, clutching the book*
The quote that will not leave you:“You don’t get to use my pain to make your point.”
Review:
“I’m not flaunting anything. I’m just existing. This is me. I can’t hide myself. I can’t disappear. And even if I could, I don’t fucking want to. I have the same right to be here. I have the same right to exist.”
Have you ever felt angry at yourself while reading a book because you cannot believe that there exists an alternative universe in which you didn’t pick up this particular story, that there is a you out there who will never experience the glory of these words that have forever changed you? Yeah, this is what happened when I read this book. And honestly, writing a review for this one is hard. Why is writing reviews for books that I feel have taken up permanent space in my soul so difficult? I cannot contain my emotions so I am giving you a bullet points- style review:
- Felix. How do I talk about Felix? Have you ever read a book and felt like the protagonist could be your best friend? That is Felix to me. There is just something so raw and genuine about Felix questioning his identity, questioning whether he is worthy of love, questioning what feelings are valid and what may just be what he thinks he should feel because of society’s expectations of him. Felix is funny and self-deprecating but above all, he loves. He gives second chances even when he’s resentful, he is kind even when people are hurting him but he also stands his ground. Felix is scared to put himself out there but all he wants is to love and be loved, a universal theme that transcends time and space. Felix contains multitudes.
- Ezra. My man. My one true love. The best BEST friend anyone could hope for. He protects Felix, is always there with an open ear and a shoulder to cry on, he’s eccentric and sarcastic and he will forever be on Felix’s side. I just. The loyalty. Ezra is such a Hufflepuff, you guys.
- The discussion of gender identity. There is a humongous amount of discussions about gender identity in the book but the perhaps most important takeaway that Callender gives us is this: gender and sexuality are a spectrum. It is completely okay for you to still question who you are even when you have “chosen” something to identify with. Felix is trans and though he is pretty sure he is a boy, there are moments when he questions his feelings, his validity. Some days, he’d like to identify with no label in existence and just – be. There are moments when he doesn’t feel like either a boy or a girl. And it terrifies and frustrates him. Besides just wanting to hug him, I just felt so relieved that this book explores the aspect I think is often overlooked when it comes to social media and gender politics: we are so quick to choose an identity, to find ourselves in word that represents what we feel that we sometimes get boxed in by that word and are scared to further explore what it means to be part of that identifying group. I loved how Callender tackled Felix’s journey and gave readers the hope and the acceptance that they might search for and haven’t found yet represented in books.
- The discussion of discrimination within the LGBTQ+ community. THIS. I was freaking out while reading this. So often, we are led to believe that it is only outside forces that discriminate against the LGBTQ+ community when there are even dissenting opinions within the community and above that, we are often pitted against each other, especially when it comes to intersectionality. All of a sudden, you have to be just the right amount of black, or queer, or trans to be accepted. And then there is this sort of unspoken agreement that a certain minority within the minority group has suffered way more and whether that means that the suffering of the other minority group isn’t as valid. I loved that discussion to pieces because it just drives home all the insecurities and fears we in the LGBTQ+ community face and that sometimes, we are our own worst enemy by believing that we are not queer enough, not 100% what is expected of the label society gives us. Callender comments on intersectionality, on the systematic erasure of certain groups and it was. Everything.
- The big driving force is love. What it means to love others, what it means to give parts of yourself to others, to be vulnerable and ready for commitment, to be fearless and also scared when it comes to putting your heart out there. And while that is fantastic and so well-done in this book, the thing that it focuses most on is loving yourself. Felix struggles with a lot – from the people who deadname him accidentally (and on purpose) to the inner fears he has that he might not be capable of love or not worthy of receiving it – it all comes down to Felix having to learn how to love himself, how to put himself first. It was so refreshing to read a book that is about love and is driven by a romantic plot that still focuses on self-love first. Felix gets his happily ever after – but more than that, he is happy by himself. And that is the most beautiful thing to read about.
Above all, Felix Ever After is an empowering tale of romance and self-discovery; it is a love letter to being yourself even when people try to take that inalienable right away from you. It’s about finding the things that make you great and working for what you believe in. It’s heartfelt and validating and exactly what this generation needs. I am just so glad this book exists and that people will get to read it and identify with Felix. There are some game-changing novels out there in this world, chronicling your life in before you read them and after and this is certainly one of them. An ode to growing up, a reminder of all the possibilities you have to define who you are, an homage to being yourself and loving yourself, Felix Ever After is not to be missed.
Felix Ever After is available from Amazon, Book Depository, and other good book retailers as of May 5th 2020.
Will you be picking up Felix Ever After? Tell us in the comments below!
Synopsis | Goodreads
From Stonewall and Lambda Award–winning author Kacen Callender comes a revelatory YA novel about a transgender teen grappling with identity and self-discovery while falling in love for the first time.
Felix Love has never been in love—and, yes, he’s painfully aware of the irony. He desperately wants to know what it’s like and why it seems so easy for everyone but him to find someone. What’s worse is that, even though he is proud of his identity, Felix also secretly fears that he’s one marginalization too many—Black, queer, and transgender—to ever get his own happily-ever-after.
When an anonymous student begins sending him transphobic messages—after publicly posting Felix’s deadname alongside images of him before he transitioned—Felix comes up with a plan for revenge. What he didn’t count on: his catfish scenario landing him in a quasi–love triangle….
But as he navigates his complicated feelings, Felix begins a journey of questioning and self-discovery that helps redefine his most important relationship: how he feels about himself.
Felix Ever After is an honest and layered story about identity, falling in love, and recognizing the love you deserve.
This is the most perfect review I have ever read. I am in absolute awe and you’ve brought a tear to my eye with this. Absolutely wonderful!