Welcome to a comedic trip through the life of one of the country’s most exciting comedians. Meet Dulcé Sloan, whose life has been an incredible journey filled with lessons and laughter. In addition to doing stand-up around the world, Dulcé is a trained actor, singer, and has been a correspondent on The Daily Show on Comedy Central.
Intrigued? Well read on to discover the synopsis and an excerpt from Hello, Friends! by Dulcé Sloan, which releases on February 6th 2024.
I wanted my own business, my own brand. I was ready to be a self-made woman when I was still a little girl.
I told my mom about my plans. Did she laugh, pat me on the head, and tell me I was adorable? No, ma’am. She went right out and got me a little fanny pack, a receipt book, and a few dollars so I could give people change. She even made up SKU numbers so I could keep track of my inventory. I started selling wholesale toys, like cheap plastic water guns and dolls, at the booth next to my mother.
The nice white man who ran the flea market let me use that empty booth for free. On some days, he’d take some of the kids riding around in his golf cart. One of those days, he drove four of us kids to this little shed-looking building on the property. He pulled up to this shed, and I got very uncomfortable. I don’t know if this man had ill intentions, but when you combine innocent children with a grown man and a creepy shed, you get trouble, or murder. I didn’t need Whoopi Goldberg to pop out and say, “Molly. You in danger girl.” I remember thinking, nope, sir, we are done here. The man was probably just turning the cart around and the shed happened to be there, but I told him I wanted to go back to my booth and to my mama. That was the first time my woman’s instinct kicked in, and it would not be the last.
When I started my cheap water gun and knock-off baby doll empire, my mom gave me business advice, woman to woman. She was dead-ass serious, telling me that if I was gonna do this, I was gonna DO THIS. This wasn’t Girl Scouts, or a janky lemonade stand. If I was starting an enterprise, I was not going to listen to Garfield in the car and pray the toys sold themselves. I was going to commit. So I did, and damned if I didn’t learn the value of a hard day’s work. During my flea market days, I would make maybe twenty or thirty bucks on a good morning. I was so happy that I had a little business, just like my mom. It took a while to go from nine-year-old South Florida toy mogul to The Daily Show, but really, the Florida City flea market is where I got my start. It just took me a lot of jobs and a lot of paycheck stubs to get to where I am now. And I do mean a lot.
I’ve had so many jobs over the years, I can’t tell you about all of them in these pages, because if I did, you’d be holding a fifty-pound book. Also, I can barely remember all of the jobs I’ve had, that’s how many there were. Long John Silvers, Value City, Victoria’s Secret, Bennigan’s, Kroger, Old Time Pottery. I’ve managed and done concessions for small theaters and worked in bilingual customer service—I got great at being proposed to in Spanish when a man wanted a discount on his stucco. I’ve heat-pressed NFL logos onto hats, had a custom gift and jewelry business, did crafts at kids birthday parties, and worked at a power company. You see what I’m saying? I’ve seen people lie, cheat, and skim off the top. I might not have been the best employee, but you know what? I keep a job. For the most part.
Excerpted from the book Hello, Friends! by Dulcé Sloan. Copyright © 2024 by Dulcé Sloan. Reprinted with permission of Andscape Books. All rights reserved.
