“My own relationship with my body is so complicated. I am endlessly surrounded by messages that tell me to love myself, to celebrate stretch marks and soft rolls, to take charge and take up space, to be unapologetically me. Show off that visible belly outline! Rock a fatkini! All bodies are beach bodies! I get that. I celebrate that. I believe that. But I’m also surrounded by messages that tell me I need shapewear, I need to lose weight, I need to fit into straight sizes, I need to look like an Insta girl, I need to be tiny to be loved. […] But my mind struggles to bridge the gap between the two ideologies. I’m fat, and I celebrate other fat people, but I don’t quite celebrate me. I would secretly give anything to be thin, while outwardly and openly rebelling against the idea that anyone should have to.”
Readers, it’s been days since I’ve finished Fat Chance, Charlie Vega and my jaw is still aching from the amount of times I grinned but also cried while reading this book. So, let’s get into the review and let me convince you why you need the best debut I’ve read since Casey McQuiston’s Red, White and Royal Blue in your life.
First of all, in this novel we follow Charlie Vega, who is a lot of things – smart, brown, funny, a writer of beautiful stories, ambitious, and fat. And people often seem to focus on that last part of Charlie’s identity, especially her mother. While Charlie is working hard to be positive about her body, it’s hard to keep up spirits when your own mother tells you to lose weight every single day. To Charlie, it seems that everyone in the world thinks they have the privilege of telling her what she needs to be: thinner, lighter, straighter-haired, quieter.
Thankfully though, Charlie has a best friend who’s always in her corner: Amelia. But even that relationship comes with feeling second-best most of the time. So when Charlie finally finds a guy she likes and who seems to like her back, everything seems to come up Vega. Until a secret from the past threatens to destroy everything Charlie and her new boo have worked so hard for…
First and foremost, Charlie. The love of my life, basically. Charlie is such an interesting and relatable character. From the first pages where she dreams about being kissed for the first time, to her navigating fatphobia and bullying at school, to her standing up for herself. I couldn’t pick a favourite character moment even if I tried to. Charlie is fierce and fabulous and fat; she believes in true love and wants to be a writer, she works hard and would go to the ends of the earth for her friends. My heart goes out to this young woman who deserves the world.
A fantastic element in this story is the continuous discussion surrounding weight culture and fatphobia. Charlie is fat and torn between believing that she is beautiful, trying to find the love online that she lacks at home, and falling prey to the doubts that she’ll never be happy with her body if she doesn’t lose weight. Imagine that little voice in your mind telling you that you need to be thinner, coming from one of the people you should trust the most – your mother. It was so heartbreaking to see Charlie and her mother’s fragile relationship that used to be good but has deteriorated ever since Charlie’s dad died. While Charlie sought comfort in food, her mother turned into someone who works out every day, counts calories, and doesn’t relax ever. Their relationship was hard to read about because you can tell both of them do what they do out of love, it’s just not the support the other needs. And of course, this messes with Charlie’s mind quite a lot. The dichotomic messages online to love yourself, yet constantly work to be fitter are confusing and hurtful and often do more harm than good.
At the heart of this story, though, is Charlie’s biggest fear, and one that we’ve all probably experienced at some point in our lives, is that of being picked second. All her life, Charlie has been accustomed to this with her best friend Amelia constantly preferred by the friends they make, by Charlie’s crush Cal, heck, even Charlie’s mother treats Amelia like the daughter she never had…all while Charlie’s on the outside looking in. And even though Charlie knows that Amelia is always on her side, it’s still not easy to be considered a consolation prize.
Reading about Charlie’s fear and how she battles this idea of being second-best was such a visceral experience. I’m sure we’ve all had moments where we’ve been overlooked or jealous of what others have gotten, but it’s an entirely different thing when it’s your best friend you’re competing with. You know they deserve all the praise they are getting, heck, you think they hung the moon, but it still stings to not have the same kind of appreciation. Yet, despite Charlie’s fear, her and Amelia’s friendship is one of the best things about this book. These girls support each other no matter what; and even though there are of course issues, these gals work through them and are always by each other’s sides in times of need and not to mention their discussions about wanting to adopt a puppy together. Amelia is the kind of friend everyone should, and Charlie is the one everyone needs to have.
And the romance. Oh boy, the romance. I don’t want to spoil too much but let’s just say that Charlie gets her heart broken by an idiot, but the guy who comes after that douchebag? Perfection. Utter perfection. He’s kind and understanding, he listens to Charlie and encourages her to work on her writing, he designs Valentine’s cards with PUNS for EVERYONE in their art class after Charlie confesses that she’s sad that not everyone will feel loved on the world’s most overhyped day of the year. I just. I’m literally speechless whenever I think about how much I love this guy. If you thought Luke Danes from Gilmore Girls was a good friend (and boyfriend), then you will adore this love interest, no doubt about it.
There are so many more things that are reasons to pick up this book but I want you guys to encounter Charlie’s relationship with her writing career and her discussions about grief and loss on your own. In all honesty, I don’t have a single thing I didn’t love about this book. The pacing was impeccable and all the different subplots interacted so well with Charlie’s main fear of not being good enough to be loved, the characters (and yes, even the antagonists) are so authentic and lifelike that the writing incites your brain to read like you’re watching a movie and the romance is so swoonworthy that I’m still all heart-eyes over the love interest in this story. I can already tell that this is going to become a comfort read for so many readers (me included) because there is something so healing about reading Charlie Vega’s story that is timeless. So, whether you pick this book up because of its stunning cover, its diverse and casual LGBTQIAP+ rep, the discussions of beauty culture or because you want a romance that warms your entire body like a cup of hot chocolate, you’re in for one hell of a ride with Fat Chance, Charlie Vega.
Both hilarious and heartfelt, Fat Chance, Charlie Vega is a tender coming-of-age story with so much heart, it will make your own grow to twice its size while reading.
Fat Chance, Charlie Vega is available from Amazon, Book Depository, and other good book retailers, like your local bookstore, as of February 2nd 2021.
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Synopsis | Goodreads
Coming of age as a Fat brown girl in a white Connecticut suburb is hard. Harder when your whole life is on fire, though.
Charlie Vega is a lot of things. Smart. Funny. Artistic. Ambitious. Fat.
People sometimes have a problem with that last one. Especially her mom. Charlie wants a good relationship with her body, but it’s hard, and her mom leaving a billion weight loss shakes on her dresser doesn’t help. The world and everyone in it have ideas about what she should look like: thinner, lighter, slimmer-faced, straighter-haired. Be smaller. Be whiter. Be quieter.
But there’s one person who’s always in Charlie’s corner: her best friend Amelia. Slim. Popular. Athletic. Totally dope. So when Charlie starts a tentative relationship with cute classmate Brian, the first worthwhile guy to notice her, everything is perfect until she learns one thing–he asked Amelia out first. So is she his second choice or what? Does he even really see her? UGHHH. Everything is now officially a MESS.
A sensitive, funny, and painful coming-of-age story with a wry voice and tons of chisme, Fat Chance, Charlie Vega tackles our relationships to our parents, our bodies, our cultures, and ourselves.
