Written by Elle Hunter
Netflix’s I Am Not Okay With This is finally a television series that unleashes the power of the teenage girl. Sydney Novak is not okay. She’s seventeen. Her dad killed himself last year, she moved to a stupid, shitty town in Pennsylvania, and her emotions are so strong they are literally erupting out of her.
Instead of ending in fights or tears, Sydney’s emotional outbursts are deadly. She cracks a wall when she’s missing her dad. When her best friend chooses a boyfriend over her, she takes it out on the school library. And when she gets rejected, no trees in the forest are safe from her uprooting emotions.
I Am Not Okay With This manages to make super powers seem…relatable. A physical manifestation of the power of emotion not only clues us in to the level of turmoil inside Sydney, but it lets us look in the mirror and see our own grief reflected.
And while it’s powerful to see this outwardly displayed, the real beauty of I Am Not Okay With This lies with the unapologetic and unlikable female narrator, Sydney (Sophia Lillis, It, Sharp Objects).
The series opens on a cut of Sydney running down the street in a dress covered in blood and the voiceover line is, “Dear diary, go fuck yourself.” Sydney isn’t here to make friends. She doesn’t give a fuck about anything. She has zits on her thighs, her grief is blinding her, and she’s a selfish asshole a lot of the time.
In addition to providing us with a rare unlikable female narrator, the series also delivers the type of talk about masturbation usually reserved for teenage boys and characters with sexual fluidity that strives to make all watchers feel welcome.
The series ultimately balances some gruesome scenes with a tenderness reminiscent of teen years themselves. Despite Sydney’s outward disgust for the world, she still has relationships with people around her who love her anyway. She pines for her best friend Dina, works through familial issues with her mother and brother, and manages to share both the secret of her thigh zits and her telekinetic powers with Stan.
It is also refreshing to watch a high school show starring high school aged actors. Both Sophia Lillis and Wyatt Oleff (Stan) are teens themselves. This adds an authenticity, especially when talking about allowing young women to be imperfect. People aren’t perfect as teens, they are awkward and gross and that can also be celebrated.
